In an ongoing effort to not to take myself seriously this morning, here is a list of common firearms types and what stereotype they associate with:
1911: Tricked Out
Do you have a Honda Civic in your driveway, too? How big is the spoiler? The same size as that magwell?
1911: Stock
Have you not supercharged your Civic because you’re too poor, because you don’t know any better, or because you don’t actually care and are content driving a Honda Civic?
Glock
“Duuuude, they’re the coolest guns in the movies! And the guy at the gun store? He totally told me how awesome they were, bro! And bro, get this, the internet told me they were like, 100% reliable, and stuff. Fist bump! Welcome to Gamma Lamba Omega, Chi Kappa chapter dude!”
Shooting my M&P. Right before I drive the Subaru home to watch shows on the internet because I'm too good for cable.
Smith & Wesson M&P
“Those Glock guys are so predictable. The M&P is the real striker gun, and purchasing one a year ago put me so far ahead of the time, now all the cops are buying them too. I have mine sitting on my desk next to Mac, but won’t be messing with it again until I finish this Kobe beef burger.”
Sig Sauer P238
“Oh my God, it’s so adorable! And I can, l like, totes get whatever little model I want. Oh my God, it’s like rainbow shiny! That’s sooo pretty! And it’s not a revolver, pushing the cylinder out on revolvers, like, ruins my manicure.”
Springfield XD
Talk to us when you’ve put more than 1,000 rounds down range.
Makarov Pistol
I shoot an obscure cartridge you probably haven’t heard of. Did you know the Flaming Pirates of Antioch are performing this weekend? They’ve developed a new sound based on cuckoo drums and libe flutes from the Rogers tribe of Kirewakra.
Beretta 92FS
You’re not in the military anymore, you can actually use any gun you like. Firearms do come without slide mounted decockers, they may not have told you that in the military but I thought I would give you a heads up. Also, you’re allowed to have hair now and you don’t have to carry around that army backpack, it smells bad.
I own a stock 1911 and I don’t drive a Civic (It’s an Element, thank you very much).
I own a M&P and down own a Mac (I build my own computers).
OK, I have the 1911 stock, the M&P stock and the Makarov stock . . . I guess I am a mess = )
You can ge the Makarov in .380 for folks that like it but want a normal cal. . . mine works great in .380. . . = )
What about H&K and all the other Sig models?
HK: I prefer my Kool-Aid to be administered rectally by clandestine tacticool ninja black operators.
SIG:
SIG owners: “Navy SEALs. To hell and back reliability.”
Everyone else: “But hammer fired guns are all but obsolete. It’s 100 year old technol-”
SIG owners: “Navy SEALs, dude. End of discussion.”
Everyone else: “Oh yeah? Are theirs diamond plated in rainbow titanium too?”
*Fight ensues*
(Coming from the owner of a pair of 226′s)
I feel a little slow. I’ve shot an XD for the past 8 years or so and fail to get the reference. Is it that “normal” XD shooters think they are better? Or that they do not want to be bothered with anyone who is new to the sport? I have normally found that it is the people who shoot 1911′s that act like “snob’s” (S.O.B.s) if you do not have the same exact gun they have. Could be why at most matches I just shoot and not worry about what others think.
Ohh do one for the Walther P99.
“James Bond is totally cool, and I enjoy guns with 9lbs of horrendously gritty DAO trigger pull. It builds character. ”
In all fairness, I like other Walther pistols. The P99 would be fantastic if it had a different trigger system.
Yes. It is.
It’s called the PPQ. A P99 fitted with a two-stage single action trigger. Superficially similar to a Glock, but firing from a fully-cocked striker released by an honest-to-goodness sear, rather than a half-cocked striker directly bearing on the trigger bar. Also has an improved magazine release and slide stop.
Alright, number one, I’m still in the military so I will continue to use my Beretta. Number two, the slide-mounted decocker is as easy to use as a 1911 safety if you just think of it as thumb forward instead of thumb up. Three, I couldn’t grow any hair anyways.
Us wheelgunners feel left out…
Seeing as how the Makarov was the service pistol for Russia and their partners since 1951, I’d imagine it’s hardly an obscure cartridge in some parts of the world. Here in the states however you are correct.
I own 3 glocks *kanye shrug*
damn, I think i own at least one of all the guns listed here, lmao. i guess i’m just schizophrenic, lol
Seamus,
You have been convicted of thought crimes by the pre-crime unit. Do not bother running as the agents with hoverpacks will be with you shortly.
I shoot 92fs, I can haz hair now? Do chicks like hair?